I have had an unusual Christmas this year it involves long distance travel, philosophy, cars over-heating, lots and lots of alcohol, money and 'Evil' foreign men.

Funnily enough I did enjoy it.

Well it started at 6 o'clock in the morning, Christmas morning is what I am referring to just in case you guys get confused, anyway Brother and me wake up at this unholy hour and get started on our super-bogus-mega-wacky journey.

Duuuuuuuude!

Oh wait Kimberly… we were talking about Christmas.

Right anyway we leave home and travel the long and winding road (known as the Pacific Highway) we arrive at Mother’s work to pick her up for Christmas dinner, she first berates me for wearing a dress, and she keeps on pointing out to us that she has forked out $55 a head for a Christmas dinner that both brother and I had sacrificed our beloved ‘South Park’ Marathon on Pay-TV for, so we wait in anticipation for our $55 a head feast. Well I don’t like to say bad things about food because food has been quite nice to me on occasion; yes food is partly responsible my mega-arse but it tastes soo good so I forgive it time and time again. Oh yes, Christmas! Anyway the dinner was okish, and the Christmas crackers were mediocre and the jokes were cheesy and when did Christmas suck so much? Oh yeah my father is dead and this is my first Christmas without him yeah but the lunch was ok, or it might have been the half bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon that made it much more enjoyable, but it was nice and family is nice and watching the lonely people on Christmas Day invest their life savings into neon poker machines is somewhat nice in a sadistic kind of way.

Well after all that Mother had to return to work so I had made plans with ‘Evil’ to catch up and see a movie that night so Brother drives me to ‘Evil’s’ place and all of a sudden when we get there Brother checks the temperature of the car and the car is over heating, but Brother and I have a Combined Car knowledge of Zero, so I run to ‘Evil’s’ apartment and ask him to help him with Brother’s car which I do not want to happen because a) Brother is tired and agitated and b) ‘Evil’ does not need to be seen in public so yes it happens Brother and ‘Evil’ finally meet, Because car is overheating and all you can do is sit and wait for car to cool down ‘Evil’ offers to sit and wait with us and yes my oh my was it almost awkward then Brother said we could go and leave him alone with his hot car.

So Evil and I catch a bus to the city and we are all discussy about what movie to see I’ll be honest I wanted to see I (Heart) Huckabees and ‘Evil’ wanted to see ‘Team America’ and I was willing to see it again but really wanted to see the Huckabee film, so I kinda guilted ‘Evil’ into it and also I knew he would enjoy it as it was an existentialist comedy and he likes to pretend he knows about existentialism, but it was good we both enjoyed it and it was fun and I made myself sick on popcorn, or it might have been the half bottle of wine I had earlier.
After the movie we walked and talked and grabbed coffee and walked and talked some more then we caught the most amazing bus it was full of tinsel and decorations and the bus driver was giving out candy canes and Christmas cards and it made me almost like Christmas.

We get back to ‘Evil’s’ place and order pizza and I get drunk watching television, then we decide to get high and because I haven’t consumed either in mass quantities for a very long time so I’m incredibly wasted but I insist on drinking everything alcoholic that he owns (and he’s an alcoholic so that’s a lot) I remember fragments of what happened that night (and no there wasn’t any sex) just me babbling and rambling.

I wake up the next morning actually quite well rested, I remember that I suggested to ‘Evil’ that we would spend the day hanging out and catch the bus home a day later but I just didn’t want to I actually wanted to go home and cry about Dad, so I called brother to come pick me up when he checked out of the hotel but call me when you leave so I have time to get dressed

So brother picks me up and we head to Chinatown and go roam the markets in pursuit of cheap sunglasses and obscure mobile phone accessories not available here in the country, I also invested in a little self-love and bought myself some unnecessary Christmas presents for myself, ok by unnecessary I mean I am poor and every spare cent should be spent on my future adventures (a.k.a. moving into flat of my own and schooling next year)

Brother and I head home, I get all teary eyed about Dad and stay that way for the entire four hour trip, I honestly don’t want to grow up without him, Even though I don’t particularly care about Christmas, it sure as hell does suck without him.